Changing your business bank account is a big deal! It took me many months of research before finally I was ready to make the change.
I wont mention the banks name but their tag line is “You’re in good hands”
The first part of my journey begins queuing outside the bank in the rain. Finally when reaching the door, which was slightly sheltered I was greeted by a young lady asking me how they could help. I explained I would like to open a business account. She quickly disappeared and I could see her through the doors talking to various people sitting behind their desks, with no customers, looking extremely busy on their computers.
Finally she came back with a form and asked me to take it away and fill out my details and then call to make an appointment. Why couldn’t anyone see me then and there? I was ready to rock ‘n’ roll and had everything with me apart from the kitchen sink – I am here ready to do business!
I should have seen the writing on the wall then and was already losing the will to live!
Back home I thought I would just open up a bank account online – It has to be easier?
The online application form was very easy and not complicated at all – especially for someone like me that has the attention span of a gnat.
A few days later I received an email welcoming me to the bank and asking me to login to open my account. I was feeling happy at this stage and all the stress was draining away!
I tried on and off for three days to login at different times only to be told the system was down and they were doing everything possible blah blah blah. They also said if you continue to have problems call into your local branch. I just want a business bank account! I had actually got ahead of myself as usual and closed my current one!
Next day off to the local branch, back in the queue (no rain this time). At the door I explained my situation. He disappears and comes back – after apparently talking to the CEO, President, Cleaner, head jobs worth, telling me they can’t help in branch and the best thing would be to complete another application online and see how you get on! I just want to do a Basil Fawlty, crawl into a ball, squat down, hands tightly over my head and bounce up and down saying “Please help me”
I don’t of course, but I am starting to boil inside. I did keep my cool and did a slow walk back to the car and took a deep breath. I did however decide in my wisdom to call the bank.
I must admit it was easy to get through and the person was very helpful and understanding promising someone would call me back with 24 hours.
That was a week or so ago! In the meantime I tried to login for what I had decided was going to be the last time. They obviously don’t want my custom.
Bingo I was able to login in and away I went. This really is a WOW moment for me. All is forgiven I might even celebrate and take my partner out for dinner tonight! How sad is that? It had taken just over two weeks to open a bank account – I will never get this time back! This is from a bank that keeps telling me “You’re in good hands” Whose are these hands? I want to meet them!
If I run my business like this I won’t have a business. I spent a lot of time doing my research – their marketing and branding is working. It’s a crowded market out there and I chose to use them.
The three employees I dealt with were professional and as helpful as they have trained to be. The problem is there was no ownership of the problem, they didn’t care and there was zero empathy! There were just ticking boxes and their job was done!
This is a great example of a relatively new business throwing millions and millions of pounds at promoting their brand, trying to breathe some fresh air into a very stale and tired industry and not succeeding.
After my experience I will be closing my account and to me they are just another boring bank more interested in their profits than people, in a very bland market place that talk a good game but failed to deliver in my case.
Everything I do online now, they are always asking me “how did we do?” I need that account open at the moment – only for a short time, so haven’t responded.
Remember whatever business you are in, the MOST IMPORTANT assets you have are your PEOPLE and your CUSTOMER!
Mike Jack is the Director of The One Consultancy